“How my marriage after infidelity by my wife not only survived … but also thrived!”
Hi, George here again.
Rather than giving general information today I wanted to tell you a little about how I personally overcame infidelity in marriage. I wont pull any punches either, I like to tell it like it is (or was at least) because some of the dumb things I did are important lessons on how NOT to save a marriage from the specter of an affair. I wanted to do this because I feel this might be able to help you avoid these mistakes and get through the bad stuff and come out the other end with a stronger marriage.
That bad stuff covers a lot though, I know it did for me. Lack of trust, anger, resentment, self pity, guilt, suspicion, vengeful thoughts, misery, depression and even blind rage! If at least some of that sounds familiar to you for your situation then I understand and I hope you read on.
You see, after 14 years of marriage my wife had an affair with her colleague at work. Our marriage was not perfect and had its ups and downs during those 14 years but I never thought it was in such bad shape that she would sleep with another man!
I was destroyed by this news when she finally told me.
I acted badly to be honest. I guess I felt justified because she had betrayed my trust … however deep down I knew I still loved her but I did not know how to do that any more. For her part I don’t think she knew how to deal with her own emotions and actions either which led to so many miscommunications, fights and straight out yelling matches that it became impossible to live with.
I move out to give each of us some space to think.
Sitting in a hotel room with my laptop on a crappy internet connection watching bad late night TV I wallowed in self pity at how low my life had sunk and that I could see a divorce looming and I seemed incapable of stopping it! Infidelity in marriage was like a poison I could not stop spreading to all other parts of my life too. My work and my relationship with friends and family were also suffering.
I needed an answer! I needed some guidance! I also wanted to quick because I did not want to sing any lower than this i thought as i watched cockroaches crawl across a dirty carpet.
I started searching for an answer online and found a lot of advice. However most was terrible, some was good but hardly covered everything I needed and the rest I have to say was dodgy links to porn sites. Before I gave up though I managed to find a gem amongst the rubbish which has led me to forgiveness and a happy marriage now.
Click here to find out more about this gem of a guide to surviving an affair
Written by an expert it was not just a collection of half baked ideas and advice but was instead exactly what I needed. Something to give me a plan to follow as well as a clear view of exactly how our emotions work in such a terrible situation. Using this guide first of all allowed me to move back in with my wife, then to break down the walls of resentment we had built up and finally to a point which can only be described as a release from a prison of distrust which allowed an almost spiritual point of forgiveness.
Quite frankly this was not a flashy book nor was it a long book full of details. However it was a concise book that detailed why I had been failing to heal my marriage. It was no so much I was doing the wrong things but I was doing them in the wrong order! By the time I had applied all the advice on this guide we had created a new relationship out of the ashes. It would never be the way it was before so instead we built a new, better and stronger marriage for which I thank god every day.
Suffice to say, marriage after infidelity does not need to be plagued by misery. If you want the help that I got click below to visit the authors page.
